Friday, October 06, 2006

Strange National Mottoes and other trivial nonsense

You lucky, lucky people.

I hit the jackpot at the Barnes & Noble purple dot sale yesterday, meaning that I got not one, not two, but three books of trivial knowledge which means that anyone who knows me well is probably cringing right now.

Because I am going to share some of my bounty with you.

These are from the book, “1001 Things You Didn’t Know You Wanted To Know.”

For instance, did you know these following national mottoes?

Czech Republic: “Truth prevails!” (Excuse me, I’m still laughing.)

Jamaica: “Out of many, one people” (It only seems that way when the ganja takes effect.)

Kenya: “Let’s work together” (So that no other country will ever win a marathon. Ever.)

Luxembourg: “We want to stay what we are” (A tiny little country of little consequence)

Switzerland: “One for all, all for one” (which proves my theory that the Three Musketeers were not French but Swiss…or that someone in the Swiss government really had a thing for Michael York in tights)

Scotland: “No one injures me with impunity.” (Uhh…ok. What about something besides an impunity?)

I don’t know. Perhaps something gets lost in the translation of these mottoes. Here are my suggestions for some other national mottoes: (and I apologize in advance to anyone I might offend)

France: “We give up. Now leave us alone.”

Mexico: “Will the last one to leave please turn out the lights.”

US: For the Red States: Either “These Colors Don’t Run,” or “Bring It On!” For the Blue States: “Don’t Blame Us, We Didn’t Elect Him, And Nobody Else Did Either.”

Canada: “So what if you have to wait six months for a bypass. We don’t have guns.”

Cuba: “Everyone is equal.” (Except some are more equal than others)

Nicaragua: “What happens in Nicaragua stays in Nicaragua…or we’ll hunt you down and kill you.”

And did you know that:
People who live in Lexington, Kentucky are called Lexingtonians

People who live in Ann Arbor, Michigan are called Ann Arborites

People who live in Syracuse, New York are called Syracusians (I lived there four years and had no clue…well I had no clue about a lot of other things, too….)

People who live in Dallas, Texas are called Dallasites. (sounds like a mineral)

People who live in Markham, Illinois are called Markham People (which points to the astoundiung lack of creativity in this town)

(and People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones)

Who comes up with these names? I also know a few local monikers:

People from Saugerties are called Saugertesians. (which has absolutely nothing to do with the fact many of the town’s residents are descendants of Italian stoneworkers who came over to build a reservoir)

People from Poughkeepsie are just confused. Most of them can’t even spell where they’re from let alone come up with what they should be called.

People from Albany are called Albanians (wait a minute…)

People from Fishkill are called Evil Animal Killers by PETA about every ten years or so…

People from Coxsackie are called something I can’t publish on the web.

Back later with more things you didn’t think you wanted to know…..

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Who comes up with these names, you wonder. I want to know who appointed the Great Translator, you know, the person who takes the name of a foreign country's cities and translates for us. Want e.g.:s? Munchen becomes Munich; Firenze for us is Florence. Even simple cities, like Roma, they have to translate into something else. Not even country names are left alone. Deustchland really means Germany. Pity that those beer drinkers there don't know it. If it weren't for us translating it for them . . .

Laurie Boris said...

I volunteer for the job!

One "fun fact" I found out is that the "Pennsylvania Dutch" are actually German, because certain lazy people mispronounced "Pennsylvania Deustche."